Finding Freedom

When I'm driving alone in my truck

With Sheryl Crow singing through my stereo

I find freedom.

When I'm dancing in bare feet

Surrounded by the rhythm and words

I find freedom.

When I'm designing a new project

And colors and ideas flow like dreams

I find freedom.

When I write of feelings and memories

Tattooing lyrics across my mind's eye

I find freedom.

10.  "What a Girl Wants" as performed by Christina Aguilera

09.  "Trashy Women" as performed by Confederate Railroad

08.  "So Yesterday" as performed by Hilary Duff

07.  "Wannabe" as performed by Spice Girls

06.  "Turn the Beat Around" as performed by Gloria Estefan

05.  "Rumors" as performed by Lindsay Lohan

04.  "In My Pocket" as performed by Mandy Moore

03.  "Believe" as performed by Cher

02.  "Achy Breaky Heart" as performed by Billy Ray Cyrus

01.  "Oops, I Did It Again" as performed by Britney Spears

Ranger's Requiem

You were always a beautiful baby.

There was show dog running in your veins.

You liked nothing more than to be groomed.

Prancing about the house, head held high,

You were Glorious Pride incarnate.

I loved the way you would stand atop the picnic table

And watch over your yard as master of all.

Your gait, stance, emotions, and courage,

Made you a King among dogs.

I remember when you'd sleep at my feet.

You had your ideas about where dogs belonged.

We'd snuggle close to each other when nightmares came.

I made you happy that day when I spent my allowance

And bought you a studded leather collar.

You pranced for days, showing off your gift.

Taking you for walks was always a joy.

You were the only dog who never tried to drag me.

A Champion, you were born for the Sidewalk Strut.

When you lost your eyesight, you did not despair.

Then the tumors came and you still wagged your tail.

You could walk barely three steps before collapsing,

But you were courageous and strong for me.

When you couldn't hold down food any longer,

When you're beautiful tail couldn't lift to wag anymore,

It was time for me to be strong for you and let you go.

Your time here has blessed me in ways I will never forget.

Now I must be kind and help you find the peace you've earned.

I love you and I will see you every day in my heart.

My Beautiful Baby Boy, I cannot let you suffer anymore.

It is out of love and compassion that I send you to God's backyard.

Join your friends who went before and play and prance once again.

There will be no more pain, no more hardship, no more weakness.

You will be the beautiful, proud King you were made to be.

Do not worry for me and those left behind for we too will come someday.

You don't have to be strong for me anymore, Ranger.

Go forward now and embrace the peace that is your due.

Man hath no better friend than his dog. Ranger Herring (3/23/1996 to 7/2/2008)

Presence

I hear your voice from a distance.

I still feel your breath on my neck.

I see where you have been in my home.

You flicker through my vision when I pass.

You stand sentry at my front door.

Items go missing only to be found where nothing ever was.

Jewelry falls from the ceiling in a lonely house.

Batteries drain and power is fickle when you are near.

Pops, bangs, footsteps and taps herald your arrival.

Dogs avoid you as they cannot understand.

I have known you from my crib,

Yet still I do not know your name.

Will you stay with me, a Guardian Angel perhaps?

Or must you stay on in this haunted abode?

10.  Sleep.  Take pills.  Repeat.

09.  Watch TV.  See how many episodes of "Law & Order" you can watch before you're ready to break the law.  My personal limit is 14.

08.  Read books that won't cause injury if they fall on your face while you sleep.

07.  Watch B-grade movies.  Try Lifetime Movie Network--they've got lots of them!

06.  Countdown the time until you can take your next pill.

05.  Eat healthy foods since you really can't taste anything anyway.

04.  Ponder the great question "How many glasses of orange juice can I drink before I turn orange?"

03.  Play Solitaire.  Play many times.

02.  Make a rough draft of your will.  (This is usually done on the worst day of the illness when you feel like you're at Death's Door and you're ready to drag yourself through.)

01.  In between naps, write a new blog entry!

How to Find Nowhere

Thump-thump. Thump-thump.

My heart bangs against my chest.

I am running to nowhere, fast,

To embrace nothing, no one.

Boom-ba. Boom-ba.

My sneakers slap the ground

In a frantic struggle to go, get away,

From everything known, understood.

Hah-huuh. Hah-huuh.

My breaths come in gasps

Trying to fill lungs but no air, no air.

Oxygen is scarce nowhere, here nowhere.

Click-clack. Click-clack.

Claws strike in harmonious chaos.

Claws belonging to no creature, no animal,

Running behind me now quick, strong.

"Easy. Easy now. It's alright."

I fall into consciousness alarmed but you're here.

With soft words and gentle kindness, soothing,

You bring me back from nowhere, nightmare.

15.  "Imaginary" as performed by Evanescence

14.  "How I Feel" as performed by Kelly Clarkson

13.  "Where Did I Go Right?" as performed by Hilary Duff

12.  "Lord I Hope This Day Is Good" as performed by Lee Ann Womack

11.  "Stronger Woman" as performed by Jewel

10.  "X-Static Process" as performed by Madonna

09.  "Straitjacket" as performed by Alanis Morissette

08.  "Hello" as performed by Evanescence

07.  "Heaven Knows" as performed by Anouk

06.  "Girl On the Verge" as performed by Sarah Hudson

05.  "Good Is Good" as performed by Sheryl Crow

04.  "Eight Easy Steps" as performed by Alanis Morissette

03.  "Cut" as performed by Plumb

02.  "Journey" as performed by Corrinne Mae

01.  "Leave the Light On" as performed by Beth Hart

Beth Hart (photo from official website)

Broken Wing

The silence rings loud

As I lay still

Wrapped in Her shroud

Forgotten in this place

My heart pounds

And a tear caresses my face

My bones rattle from Her chill

Cradled in my flesh

Forever until She has Her fill

With my now broken wing

I cannot fly

To hope I must cling

Someday my mind will clear

My soul free

As I dry my final tear

Poet's Madness

I've got angels shining around my head

And demons dragging down my feet.

Temptation's Siren is calling my name

But Salvation's knocking at my door.

This old world moves faster and wild.

I can't stand in this place forever.

There's Opportunity opening doors

And Fear slamming them closed.

The voices in my head grow louder

While my voice is reduced to a hum.

I should scream for Sanity's sake,

But what's one more cry in this cacophony?

I confess in ink and paint portraits with tears.

Try to sell my soul with fake smiles,

And have it returned, cracks painted over.

Obey my voices and I deny myself.

Cauldrons boiling over in my skull

And tarot cards at my fingertips.

A Holy Bible by my bedside

And a prayer dancing on my lips.

A contradiction of a new conception

And an emanation of confusion.

An example of poet madness,

I am my Muse's warped reflection.

The above photo was taken in Jacksboro, Texas, last year.  A small business owner chose to wish fathers a "Happy Farter's Day."  My dad got a kick out of it as did many other fathers he e-mailed the photo to.  With Father's Day on the 15th (only 5 days away), I thought I would share this humorous photo and offer some Father's Day gift ideas.  The following list contains favorite Father's Day gifts as chosen by random dads:

--Scooby-Doo boxers

--John Wayne framed poster

--Digital photo frame

--iPod and/or iPod accessories (don't forget the iTunes gift card!)

--Full cleaning of his vehicle by his child

--A child (This dad had a very special Father's Day when his son was born that afternoon)

--Chihuahua (It takes a confident man to own a Chihuahua.  Every male in my family has one.)

--Grand Theft Auto San Andreas video game (For a gamer dad this year, look for GTA IV)

--"The Last Picture Show" DVD

--Coffee maker and a bag of Starbuck's coffee

--Hunting rifle

--Surprise visit from adult children bearing his favorite dishes

--Leather wallet

--"Blazing Saddles" DVD

--Fishing pole

--A Johnny Cash greatest hits collection CD set

--Car stereo system

--"Lucky You" cologne

--X-Box 360 gaming console

--Theme park trip

--Recliner

--Handcrafted leather belt

--Entertainment system

--Western decor

--Vacation to London

--Electric razor (This dad just adds, "It was SOME razor!")

--Outdoor grill

These are just some dads' favorite Father's Day gifts.  If you have a favorite Father's Day gift or know of your father's favorite gift, feel free to add a comment!

Have a Happy Farter's--I mean, Father's--Day!